Thanks must go to Mike for this nifty idea.

Imagine how much fun work would be on Talk Like a Pirate Day. Forget about casual Fridays or the ever-popular “Wear Matching Socks” days, TLAP Day would enable you to say what you really mean without getting into trouble.

Here’s how my “pirated” voicemail would sound:

“Ahoy there matey! You’ve reached Captain Staring. I’m either raiding the supply cabinet or walking the plank. State yer demands. BEEP.”

Here are ways you can freak out on your coworkers:

“Shiver me timbers Joe, we needed to fly that up the flagpole hours ago!”

“Don’t make me raise my eye patch.”

“I’d spell it out for ye but ARG, I can’t read!”

“Talk to the claw.”

Oh, and for those other occasions:

“Arg, the pop machine ate all my doubloons.”

“Polly paid ye a visit. There’s a spot on yer shoulder.”

“Ahoy! We have the map!”

The possibilities are endless, which is why TLAP Day should happen at least once a month. You might want to check with management before installing the plank though. Arg!