My ability to blog on a regular basis is failing me at the moment. Perhaps it's the weather. Or that I watch waaay too much television. ;)

Here's what's holding me back this week:

"I'm having too much fun doing other things."
Now, "other things" might range from earning a good income to organizing the spice rack, but all that matters is that you're drawn to doing those things instead of achieving those goals you really wanted to accomplish. Le sigh.

It's the whole "fear of success/fear of failure" rearing its ugly head. Or two heads.

Sometimes it's easier to not do anything instead of putting your heart and soul into a project and watching it wither and die because it wasn't as fantabulous as you thought it was. Or, perhaps its fantabulousness isn't what the world needs at the moment.

I know this all too well. And I guess when I'm faced with the choice of working on the umpteenth draft of a WIP or eating cheezies and watching Melrose Place reruns, the latter will usually come out ahead. Especially the episodes when Kimberly comes back from the dead and convinces Sydney that Michael must die. Good times.

But then, after about two episodes, I start to get a bit mopey when I think about that crusty WIP that just needs one more go at it to become the Novel that Will Make a Difference. And no, I'm not talking about my novel actually making a difference for all of humanity, I mean that this novel will make a difference for my writing career.

Like actually landing a literary agent and/or a book contract. Yeah, total full-on cheerleaders-with-a-parade-and-chocolate-fountains time.

And that's when I get escareded. Because what if, even after putting everything into this draft, it still doesn't land me an agent or contract? What then?

The adult in me says, "Move on, write the next book," while the eight-year-old says,"That's so not gonna happen!"

Isn't blind faith a wonderful thing?

Trouble is, the reality of the publishing world is out there. Not everyone gets published. Even those who try really, really hard. And that makes me sad.

But is that enough for me to avoid giving this WIP my best shot?

Not today, and hopefully not until I get to the end, for which I've given myself the deadline of March 31, 2009. Yes, even though I have a gazillion other things to do. And even though I'll be spending most of March working full-time hours.

I can totally do this, no excuses. Gulp.