First of all, if you've never seen an episode of The Price Is Right, you won't get this post. So come back tomorrow.

The older I get, the more I realize that life is like being on Contestant's Row. Some really want to be there, while others would rather be anywhere else (like the husbands who get forced to come along with their pricing-savvy wives).

Once you finally arrive on Contestant's Row, the first thing you want to do is get outta there ASAP. Isn't that what happens to all of us when we get to certain stages in our lives? We start saying things like "I can't wait until..." or make new to-do lists that never allow us to celebrate reaching our current position. Ah, just like on Contestant's Row - there's no rest for the wicked. And there are only a limited number of opportunities to get up on stage for the real game.

But while you're there, you soon discover that:
1. Being first isn't always the best
2. Others will learn from your example and use it against you (by bidding $1 higher)
3. Sometimes you have to determine the value of things you don't even want
4. Having people yell at you is completely normal
5. Listening to the others is essential
6. Wearing horizontal strips is way bad
7. Acting happy when the other guy gets on stage instead of you is encouraged, no matter how painful it gets
8. Helping to control the pet population is something that everyone can do
9. Spitballs aren't allowed
10. If and when you're selected to go onstage, do it fast so Bob doesn't have time to forget what to say next

I really should book my flight to Burbank before Mr. Barker retires...